Thursday, March 13, 2008

Good Posture

I’ve just discovered that if I sit up, I can see the water in the reservoir through the office window, which is almost like having a nice view. If I don't, I just see the traffic on something that might be I-95. This may or may not be enough to inspire good posture.

Good posture is also one of my friend’s reported self-help secrets. I think that any day that starts with a failed attempt at a half hour nap in the driver's seat of one's car, in a cold parking lot (at 7:30am) can use all the help it can get, self- or otherwise.

Thinking about the difficulty of maintaining good posture in the chair in which I’m sitting (which probably cost as much I’ll make all week at This Place - a very sturdy leather jobber, with wheels that actually roll, and arms and everything) has now led me to lower the seat of said chair, which might significantly improve the quality of my remaining 28.5 hours here. (Not counting the extra day at the end of the month.) *

I wonder what else good posture could do for my life: land me a better job? get me into graduate school? win me a husband? make money appear in my bank account, gourmet food in my kitchen, gasoline in my car's tank.... perhaps this is something I should investigate further. Perhaps an entire self-help regime could be invented (and marketed) based solely on sitting - and standing - up straight: books extolling the effects of good posture on your life; videos of exercises to improve your posture; small desktop reminders to 'sit like a winner'; even specialized clothing or braces like you'd wear to cure scoliosis, only much sexier and designed to be worn outside your clothes so that 1. you can show everyone that you're a stand-up-straight winner, and 2. you can more readily display the brand imprints and advertising messages emblazoned on your corrective device.

I could really be onto something here: the new cure-all for the new generation, the money-maker of the century, the savior of so many lost-twenty-something-souls. "Sit up straight" - what a battle cry! It would make my mother proud.

So I’ll quit working, give up graduate school, throw everything out the window – and talk my friend into creating the Sit Up Straight School of Self Help with me. Brilliant, no?

Just you watch – in eight months you’ll be surfing channels at 4am and see an infomercial for the Posture Plan, and you’ll know I was really onto something.

* For some reason I'm working four consecutive days at This Place, and then one random day in another two weeks. More on This Place in a future post.....

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